Missoula mt gay bar

Missoula Has Pride – But Is It LGBTQ+ Friendly? A Lesbian Traveler’s Perspective

Missoula, Montana caught my attention with its scenic beauty, progressive reputation, and a June 2nd city-wide vote to adopt the Pride flag as its official city flag. But after spending a weekend exploring its shops, restaurants and nightlife, I walked away with mixed feelings. While I found signs of support and some friendly faces, there was also a quiet undercurrent of being watched or judged — something many queer gay know all too well.

I wanted to check out Missoula for a number of reasons before the Pride flag ruling: the abundance of nature, the college-town culture, the folk and Americana music acts at the local amphitheater. From what the locals tell me, the Pride weekend in Missoula has a huge turnout, and lots of local businesses will walk in the Pride parade or have booths at the festival.

However, once the city adopted the Pride flag as the city flag in order to display it on government buildings, I knew I needed to see this place for myself. I missoula the population is almost 80, but the city seems so… spread out. The owner checked me in and was incredibly friendly, and I was impressed to see how much rainbow decor was on display.

I felt more at ease here. While the view of the mountain was absolutely stunning and the breakfasts were top notch, the highway noise was constant. It just made it less inviting to sit outside on my private balcony. It was beautiful. My first night in town I had dinner at Old Chicago, and to say I noticed the stares would be an understatement… There were two of us at dinner, myself and another woman, and from the moment bar walked in I could just FEEL the eyeballs.

Not for a long time, but enough to catch my attention. The next day we attended a Lord Huron concert at the Kettlehouse Amphitheater. That venue is absolutely gorgeous. Completely surrounded by mountains and tucked away enough that I felt at one with nature and music. I would go again any time.

This saved a lot of time and annoyance with parking. The laid back Kettlehouse crowd gave off an accepting vibe. I felt more stares from the staff. Like they were sizing us up to determine if we were together and if they approved of that. That was the kind of vibe I picked up nearly everywhere we went; a feeling of tolerance, but not actual acceptance.

And while nothing bar said, I was never approached and never felt threatened in any way, the feeling of disapproval, or at least a feeling of others being unsure of me, was evident. I think the most impactful conversation I had during missoula trip was with a queer man at the downtown bar Rhinoceros which is conveniently located right next to the Kettlehouse shuttle drop off.

He said during Pride month there will be lots of flags and a parade and people come into Missoula from the surrounding cities where there is little to gay gay community presence, and during June he feels he can actually be himself openly. Tolerance versus acceptance. It truly seemed to be the theme everywhere I went and with most of the people I talked to.